Discussion of the Day
How do you handle people who constantly ask personal questions you're not comfortable answering?
Natalia J 52132111-Jan-25
The best way to deal with someone who constantly asks you personal questions is to ask them why they want to know. It really is that simple, folks. Depending on what answer they give, it's at that point you have the option to proceed or not. You don't have to answer anything that you don't want to. What is your advice? How do you handle people who constantly ask personal questions you're not comfortable answering?
Comments
  • Manel 1271300
    I know sometimes it’s hard to avoid some people, they are so straightforward and try to get answers quickly! But I tell myself ‘please have patience and be strategic not to annoy them. There’s no point arguing with such people who do not understand to be polite!😊
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    • Lawrence 1262145
      I say please don't ask me those questions anymore and walk away
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      • Manel 1271300
        Just brief them with your circumstances and avoid giving all the details! I would be more tactful in my answers without being cross with the person. This world is run on gossip, those will never stop. So better to live with it than go against It!
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        • Pat C 618241
          Don't think I know anyone who does that. Maybe because I tell them I don't want to and I don't want to hear their side of things either!
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          • Carolyn7 P
            I say "That is not something I wish to discuss with you, so mind your own business."
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            • TriFaye420
              "My personal life has a Do Not Enter sign, and I'm not handing out VIP passes – not even for my snack collection!"
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              • Katzeye
                I've never been put in this position but if I was I would just be honest and say , well actually I prefer we don't have this discussion, it's kind of personal.
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                • Stu J
                  If you cant dazzle them with science - baffle them with bullshit!
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                  • Dolan 1467056
                    depends on the fact - do you want them to keep coming around such as a friend or social member. If not then tell them what you think and if they don't come back, who cares, at least they got the message. If is someone you care about, then a more personal answer is due. Let's change the subject, i am not comfortable to talk about that, can we just move on.....etc. If they also care about you, this will work fine. If that doesn't work, then a more personal, but polite answer may be necessary, as long as they get the message but are not embarrassed or keep on for an answer they want, then you can avoid the question in the future. Some people are just rude and only want their answer so you have to move into their world for a short time and show them what it feels like to be bullied or treated like the media treats us................ At that point, put them in their place and let the future be as it may as they accept what you want and not their own personal interest!
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                    • Carolyn H 319412
                      I thoroughly agree with you. You could also tell them that it is none of their business. End of conversation.
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                      • marni k
                        I tell them to MYOB or I'm not answering that as that's personal.I was in my backyard gardening my neightbour stuck her head over the back gate and asked me what I was doing I replied minding my own business while you are not. She got the point straight away. No problems ever since.
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                        • Bernadette S 103492
                          Don't "handle them" just excuse yourself and walk away.
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                          • tinytotmom420
                            it's really simple u tell me this what you think n feel about me is completely your business n how i think n feel about u is none ya business
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                            • Ruth v
                              Tell them its none of their business.
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                              • Pamela B 862973
                                You don't have to answer personal question. Just tell them you don't want to talk about it.But be nice telling them.
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                                • Angela 1484008
                                  Depends what you class as a "Personal Question". Some people are more private than others, How are you? Is that a personal question because that is all about you. If you don't want to answer just say no or lie.Asking them why they want to know is defensive and already presuming it is negative with bad intentions.
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                                  • Manel 1271300
                                    Yes if you are not comfortable to answer the person who ask questions about you, you can politely say so!😀
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                                    • Maureen G-Melb.Vic.
                                      I agree with you Melissa, I find it most uncomfortable to be asked these questions, and have dropped people for this probing questioning for no valid reason.
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                                      • Judy T 470524
                                        Be honest, just tell them that you are not comfortable answering that type of question from them. It is best to be honest.
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                                        • Jill C 324214
                                          I don't have that problem.
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                                          • Margie 1402177
                                            I answer “why is the sky blue?
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                                            • ABIOLA SAMSON 1625242
                                              . If they persist, I just shrug and ignore them or walk away!
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                                              • Ellen P 667007
                                                I would say, "Why do you need to know?" or "I'd rather not say - let's talk about something else."
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                                                • Woofers
                                                  I pretend to be an infamous celebrity and Just say No comment. If they persist, I just shrug and ignore them or walk away! Well, you all know how touchy we can be. Kinda like a bunch of freshly shaved cats, locked in a room together, filled with rocking chairs!
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                                                  • Margie 1402177
                                                    I never knew the cats were FRESHLY SHAVED in that saying 👍
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                                                  • WoofersMargie 1402177
                                                    Hi Margie, you never knew that cats are shaved? well of course, only after they subdued!
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                                                • Andrew T 123623
                                                  I ask them the same question before answering them. Or them them to go to the far queue.
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                                                  • Ann 1498966
                                                    I just say that in order to protect the privacy of others, I can't answer that. Or if it is a kid asking, I just tell them it's not a polite question.
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                                                    • Melissa aimee
                                                      I had a 'friend' like this... Constantly asking uncomfortable questions, I told her I wasn't comfortable answering as it didn't have a simple straight forward answer. I feel annoyed when this happens and decide whether people of that nature are so invested in my life and why they want to know... It feels like idle gossip to me and don't like it. I cut people out of my life often due to things of this nature. Life's too short for people you can't trust in your inner circle.
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                                                      • Linda 1611099
                                                        So true. I feel the same way. I feel that it is an intrusion to ask uncomfortable questions and it does feel like idle gossip which I do not like at all.
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                                                    • Shetland Tony
                                                      A couple of things which I find effective. Be vague, you can give some information while remaining unclear or uncertain. For example, you could say 'Let's just say it cost more than my old one. Or just politely say No!! You could say something like 'I'm sorry, but I'd prefer not to say' or 'I don't mean to be rude, but I don't want to answer that question'. Maybe if you didn't like them perhaps a 'How kind of you to take such a vivid interest in whats none of your business' or perhaps 'I didn't realise we were playing 20 questions, and you've already exceeded your limit'. Works for me..
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                                                      • Paula J 395266
                                                        I haven't been asked any personal questions that I was comfortable or uncomfortable with.
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                                                        • Helen L 750218
                                                          Redirect the question to them or change the subject politely, or crack a joke and change the subject.
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                                                          • Allen B 175494
                                                            MYOB
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                                                            • Lorne M
                                                              Ask "What will you do with the information you seek?"
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                                                              • Greg B 520364
                                                                That's personal, and I don't wish to answer. That's FULL stop.
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                                                                • Chris N 853314
                                                                  Well said.
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                                                              • Brian L 387567
                                                                Depending, but one response is that I ask them to meet me somewhere more private to discuss these things together. Another is that I ask them if I can get a witness before we begin.
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                                                                • Chris N 853314
                                                                  It's kinda a shame if it gets this far eh...
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                                                              • Sandra 1575376
                                                                I don't answer and advise that these questions are inappropriate and so let's end this conversation now!!!
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                                                                • Harry 1361654
                                                                  Ditto.
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                                                                  • Mooi
                                                                    I don’t talk to people. I would rather have a conversation with my dogs.
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                                                                    • Melissa aimee
                                                                      I absolutely agree 👍 dogs are such wonderful companions. Loving, loyal and endlessly there to love you as you are 🩵💚💙
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                                                                  • ROBERT 1602511
                                                                    reverse the question and ask the same and see result
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                                                                    • Liane H
                                                                      I usually smile and keep them guessing .. depends on what personal info they are asking and who! If it's too close to the bone I will lie and say "no ,never happened to me if I don't trust them with that information" .
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                                                                      • Elizabeth A 807208
                                                                        It all depends on what the questions is about
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                                                                        • Judy 1514577
                                                                          I ask them why?
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                                                                          • Shawn B 1061185
                                                                            I make sure I have a very douer look on my face to show I'm not happy and do what you do.
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                                                                            • Bill H 487635
                                                                              Ask them if their mother was ever married
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                                                                              • Edith v
                                                                                I also ask why do they want to know OR just say that is my business
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                                                                                • just me- NZ
                                                                                  I dont have people asking me any questions. Only How are you ? . Thats about it.
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                                                                                  • Greg 1018018
                                                                                    do not go there not your business,or we have a problem.
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                                                                                    • Larry S 382961
                                                                                      I try to ignore them and give just basic answers or MYOB
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                                                                                      • Paul B 522937
                                                                                        just mind your own business
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                                                                                        • Bugalugs
                                                                                          Don't you jst love these interfering, gossipis? For that is all they are. When I am confronted by such a person I turn the tables, sparing them and their feelings nothing. Ask them this in a vice LOUD enough so that everyone else can hear you.. Why do you want to know all this private information? Are you just the local nosey parker, Gossip merchant? Then turn on your heel and walk away. They Hate it.
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                                                                                          • Wendy Q
                                                                                            Because they must feel insecure.
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                                                                                            • Kaaere 1587240
                                                                                              Yeah pretty much .... It is why they want to know?
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                                                                                              • Janet 1621979
                                                                                                If they keep doing it - I just mix with other people or change the subject.
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                                                                                                • pam rae
                                                                                                  HI THERE Hanno
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                                                                                                  • TERRIE K
                                                                                                    I've never had to deal with people asking me personal questions except for my doctor, naturally. I'd just ask them why they want to know and leave it at that.
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                                                                                                    • MJ 1621905
                                                                                                      I simply tell them it's not any of their business
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                                                                                                      • Dennis 1500002
                                                                                                        Just tell them you never even had to tell the guards or Warden that and leave them guessing who exactly they are dealing with
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                                                                                                        • Jenny L 591463
                                                                                                          Never really been in that situation before. If you don't feel comfortable in divulging that sort of information change the subject. Don't answer the question and move on. Walk away if they are being persistent. They may get the hint then but it may depend on who is asking these personal questions.
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                                                                                                          • Pauline T 68358
                                                                                                            Tell them MYOB
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                                                                                                            • Rose I 1205334
                                                                                                              Depends on who it is. Either give them all the uncomfortable details or glare and look scary
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                                                                                                              • Jennine 1587631
                                                                                                                It depends on the person and why they are asking. Mostly if they are someone I do not know well or just being snoop. I tell them it is None of your business.
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                                                                                                                • Missy Wyld
                                                                                                                  none of your business.
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                                                                                                                  • Jania S
                                                                                                                    I definitely was bought up and live in a different world than some of the questioners? I don't think I have ever had anyone constantly ask personal questions ... Maybe I don't attract them.... don't know... but....
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                                                                                                                    • Jessica 1625160
                                                                                                                      Mind your business lol
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                                                                                                                      • Arnetha 1621358
                                                                                                                        You explain the question is great deal and to deal with it is figure out how to solve the situation will help.
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                                                                                                                        • Joe B 288252
                                                                                                                          Mind your own business and I’ll mind mine . Kiss your own mother and I’ll kiss mine………….lol
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                                                                                                                          • bryan e 667720
                                                                                                                            thanks disie bryan
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                                                                                                                            • Victoria 315341
                                                                                                                              I refuse to answer nosey people, I will change the subject. My life my business, I don't like gossip and wont add fuel to the flame. When I want advice I will pay for it.
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                                                                                                                              • Disie
                                                                                                                                I don't care, I'd tell them if they were a good friend and if I didn't say they wouldn't ask. I'm Gen X and we still have manners
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                                                                                                                                • bryan e 667720
                                                                                                                                  tell them you have made your WILL and there not in it bryan
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                                                                                                                                  • Dale 1625153
                                                                                                                                    I changed the attention from myself and asked the other person.What's their story
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                                                                                                                                    • Joy L 68767
                                                                                                                                      I joke and make up stuff
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                                                                                                                                      • Izabelle 1457992
                                                                                                                                        I avoid them like the plague! Those people are usually narcissistic, they tell you personal things about them to lure you into confessing, then they spread gossip about you knowing you're not low enough to do it back..
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                                                                                                                                        • SUSIE W
                                                                                                                                          Tell them it’s personal
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                                                                                                                                          • Robert T 597718
                                                                                                                                            ask them the same questions
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                                                                                                                                            • Igor A
                                                                                                                                              Just start asking personal questions in return without answering theirs.
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                                                                                                                                              • Victoria 1624908
                                                                                                                                                Tell them to stop being so nosy
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                                                                                                                                                • Sonya F 68771
                                                                                                                                                  Surveys ask a lot of personal questions sometimes i dont like to answer them
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                                                                                                                                                  • Disie
                                                                                                                                                    You don't have to answer them, you won't do any surveys. They target certain demographics that's why you are screened. I'm 57 now and am screened out of most because of my age.
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                                                                                                                                                • mario s 74494
                                                                                                                                                  I don't have or allow people like that into my life.
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                                                                                                                                                  • Sheree T
                                                                                                                                                    I would just tell them straight out, that it is on an a need to know basis and since it doesn't relate to what we are talking about, you don't need to know.
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                                                                                                                                                    • Jennifer H 722364
                                                                                                                                                      I say I find that question inapproipate and I will not be answering it shall we move on .And any or all my personal information is something that I will share if I choose and with whom .It can be a form of bullying .
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                                                                                                                                                      • Kimberly 1603434
                                                                                                                                                        I would ask the same: WHY DO YOU WANT TO KNOW?? There has to be reasoning as to why they would ask such questions.
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                                                                                                                                                        • Danielle R 478487
                                                                                                                                                          I am usually the listener,/ people watcher in most conversations. People with poor social skills or can't see body language cues talk about themselves more. I let them talk. If I am asked a question I feel is too personal I will tell them I don't feel comfortable discussing that area of my life. They usually accept that and continue their own narrative. Close friends ,people I trust are different,they have genuine empathy,ask me questions out of concern or Interest I will make the effort to have that meaningful talk with as I know they have my best interests at heart,and because I know that if I tell them I am not ready to talk about something they accept that graciously.
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                                                                                                                                                          • Jules 544763
                                                                                                                                                            Just say I'm not comfortable talking to you about my personal stuff and let's change the subject thanks. Be direct and let them know you don't want to talk about this stuff with them or ask why they want to know.
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                                                                                                                                                            • allin
                                                                                                                                                              i just tell them, nunya business
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                                                                                                                                                              • Rodwings
                                                                                                                                                                Most of the time I am an open book. Maybe sometimes, too open. That's the risk you take if you want to ask personal questions of me. Obviously there is not too much I won't answer...but beware!
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                                                                                                                                                                • Jennifer 1540583
                                                                                                                                                                  I just answer what I feel comfortable with.
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                                                                                                                                                                  • diana 1578758
                                                                                                                                                                    NOB
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                                                                                                                                                                    • boy blunder
                                                                                                                                                                      I am not uncomfortable answering anything, most of the people I know wouldn't ask personal questions but if asked by a friend I would have no issue telling them,
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                                                                                                                                                                      • Susan 1570865
                                                                                                                                                                        I have never been interested in someone's personal life. If they talk about it, so be it. I also do not like people asking me about my personal life, and I will ignore the question if they persist. I then tell them it has nothing to do with them.
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                                                                                                                                                                        • Glenys H 310155
                                                                                                                                                                          a friend of mine would answer any question with "nunya" the person would ask nunya? none ya business was always the answer.
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                                                                                                                                                                          • doug p 631197
                                                                                                                                                                            I'll tell them I'm not comfortable answering the questions as I like my privacy. If they persist of start getting insistent I start asking the very personal questions about them. Most will then shutup but if they continue I tell them i will release the kraken.
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                                                                                                                                                                            • Rabbitohs
                                                                                                                                                                              That's a good question, I will have to think about your question and get back to you
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                                                                                                                                                                              • Daniel T 626103
                                                                                                                                                                                Ask them why they need to know, or ask them equally personal questions.
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                                                                                                                                                                                • Teri 1282723
                                                                                                                                                                                  I just remembered .. many years ago a friend would ask people, "What's it to ya? You a cop?"
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                                                                                                                                                                                  • Glenys H 310155
                                                                                                                                                                                    a friend of mine would answer any question with "nunya" the person would ask nunya? none ya business was always the answer.
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                                                                                                                                                                                • Saara F
                                                                                                                                                                                  I give a generic response and never go into detail then that way you have answered the question vaguely and you can continue your conversation. It is better to give a response that way the other person knows where you stand.
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                                                                                                                                                                                  • Dsmiles2U
                                                                                                                                                                                    Are you going to write a book about me ? Then ....................
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                                                                                                                                                                                    • Christine 1448143
                                                                                                                                                                                      It is not easy handling people who constantly ask you personal questions. Someone I know asks questions on health related topics that I do not even know the answers myself. I am polite and say that I do not have the answers. It definitely can make you feel uncomfortable. I find it is good then to change the topic of conservation.
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                                                                                                                                                                                      • Beverly I
                                                                                                                                                                                        This has never happened to me but if it doe's I'll either walk away or ask that person questions
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                                                                                                                                                                                        • Linda 3
                                                                                                                                                                                          I remember one time it happened I just smiled and replied, Are you writing a story about me or something, They got the hint and changed the subject.
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                                                                                                                                                                                          • pam rae
                                                                                                                                                                                            TY JANN R
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